old enough...

No more pain

2009-06-21T12:20:00.003+01:00

Sunday 21st June

This is Alice Paul's daughter, I'm afraid to say my Dad passed away last Tuesday evening after a long struggle with Cancer.

We are going to keep his Blog open for a while for any comments or if you want to contact us.

This will be the last entry for 'old enough to moan'.

Rest in peace Dad x

Thanks Alice for starting this off. I promised Paul I would enter his last blog but am finding it even harder than I ever imagined. Paul you are loved so much and are sadly missed. Our beautiful daughters are keeping me going and knowing that you are no longer in pain helps a little.

Love always Zoe

11 June 2009 – Oncology appointment

2009-06-11T13:59:00.001+01:00

We met with the Oncology Doctor today and it is more of the same for a while, three more chemotherapy sessions over the next three weeks following by a short break, two weeks this time.

We requested a two week break if possible in order to get away for another holiday, this time doing Bed and Breakfasts from home to Scotland and back. We are keeping fingers crossed that I once again improve on chemotherapy and have no set-backs.span>

10 June 2009 – Not feeling too grand

2009-06-10T12:14:00.000+01:00

I feel as if I am being made to suffer today as suffer I have indeed. Upon waking this morning, having slept throughout the night for the first time in so long I cannot recall how long since the last full nights rest, I realised I had not taken last night’s tablets. Add to the lack of medication the fact that I have been overdoing it and the combination leaves me extremely tired and weak, so much so that I was in tears first thing through pain, mental anguish and general lethargy.

I have since come around a little today and thankfully we managed to put off phoning the hospital through general concern.

Although I have a day off chemotherapy this week I am not feeling any of the benefits as I am unable to leave the settee really being too weak to walk far without pain or being short of breath.

Update 9 June 2009 - Excellent break

2009-06-09T10:45:00.000+01:00

We had a fantastic weekend away from home on the Norfolk Broads where the weather was much nicer to us than that predicted by the experts so we managed to stay dry for most of it. Unfortunately I did get wet and cold standing around waiting for a taxi to take us to a Public House for Sunday lunch and I never warmed through for the rest of the day and felt very poorly later. Added to that I had to drive all the way home [3 hours] the following day as my partner was ill the night before we left having eaten something that disagreed with her.

Other than that we had a brilliant time and everyone enjoyed themselves and it is definitely something I would recommend, but not in the high season as it would be packed and then there are the boats full of lads on Stag nights! A Stag is OK if you are female, young and on the pull, not so good if you are moored up to one for the night, which thankfully we managed to avoid. [The trick to avoid mooring next to one is to moor on the opposite bank to the pubs!]

No chemo this week but I do have my Macmillan nurse coming today and I will have to tell her about the pains I am now experiencing in my back as a result of yesterdays drive home. I was unable to stand upright first thing this morning but I am able to rest better now that I have got some medication in my system.

A mini-break or two

2009-06-04T14:44:00.000+01:00

A quick visit to see my GP today to have medication for water retention, still have swollen ankles but not as bad as they were, and more medication to alleviate the pains from constipation that can be excruciating at times.

I am hoping the next three days, when we are boating on the Norfolk Broads, will be as good as the last two have been for me; that way the mini-break should be good for everyone involved. I shall therefore not be online until the beginning of next week, so cheerio for now as I make hay whilst the sun shines, or in our case as it drizzles with rain.

If this weekend proves successful we are hoping to have many more times away between chemotherapy sessions.
A friend has offered the load of his caravan on a seasonal site for a weekend.
We are thinking of travelling to Scotland stopping off along the way via Bed and Breakfast establishments.
A trip to Ireland would be in order as I would love to take my wife to Dublin.

Chemotherapy #3

2009-06-03T19:31:00.005+01:00

A good day once again as I only required one nurse [and I got the best in Rose] who only needed the one needle and one attempt once again so either I am getting better or the nurses of been retrained in how to deal with patients like me and veins like mine.
I told her to put the needle underneath [underside of my arm] as I do not like it on top, to which she giggled and made me blush!

Felt extremely tired yesterday evening after my chemo session and that has continued today so much so that when we went on a family ‘walk’ I was encouraged to use my wheelchair for the return journey, which I did. Not only was it new to me but also to my daughter who pushed me uphill most of the way. Oh, and nearly out of the chair up the road kerb sides!
You do not realise just how bumpy the pavements are until you are in a wheel chair.

Joined the We are Macmillan. Cancer support website http://www.whatnow.org.uk/

Bloods OK – Monday 1 June

2009-06-02T09:20:00.000+01:00

A good day yesterday in and out quickly for blood tests with a really nice and talkative nurse who appeared pleased to have someone to have a sensible conversation with and someone who doesn’t moan too much, Me?!
Let’s hope the chemo goes the same way today and I have nothing to moan about later on today.

Stomach pains continue – 27 May

2009-05-30T16:16:00.000+01:00

It was once again 03.00am when I was running a bath in order to alleviate the pains in my back and stomach. It came as a surprise to me then that I had to run another bath at 06.00am to do the same. My partner, Zoe, woke me up at 08.00am as I still lay, fast asleep, in the bath water.

In order to give my stomach a rest I had unwisely lay off taking Paracetamol during a good part of the day, an experiment I shall not be repeating today given last night’s unsatisfactory results.

I still have the problems with stomach pains which at times have me bent over double trying to get some relief. I will have to monitor the situation and inform those who know better of the symptoms, which hopefully can be attributed to the effects of chemotherapy and nothing any more sinister than that.

Good thing about being up so early is the lovely birdsong that ordinarily gets lost amongst the traffic and background noise. Listen out for it, it really is magical.

Stomach pains

2009-05-28T13:25:00.002+01:00

I do not understand why my stomach should be giving me so much trouble today but I am in a little bit of pain around the abdomen and I am unable to relieve it no matter what I try.

I will monitor it for the rest of the day and see how it goes.

I had a later start to the day than intended and was woken up abruptly by a really bad dream. In the dream I was attempting to get home to my family only to be apprehended by someone I thought I knew but turned out not to. They started to take me off in the opposite direction to home. I panicked in the dream and began to vomit, fortunately it did not translate to real life as I was not being sick just a minor dribble.

Chemotherapy #2 of 3

2009-05-26T15:21:00.001+01:00

I can honestly say that it is getting easier to have chemotherapy now that I am feeling better again. I am able to relax more and as a result I believe those around me, including the nurses, also find it easier to administer the medication.
One nurse [Lorraine – she has now drawn the ‘short straw’ four times out of five] and one needle results in one successful trip to the Oncology outpatients.

We can now begin to look forward even more to our plans to holiday between chemo sessions.

Naturally I shall begin to feel tired later and maybe a little sick but in the scheme of things that is no great hardship.

Spooky

2009-05-25T17:37:00.000+01:00

The University Hospital was like a ghost town today due to it being a Bank Holiday. Does this mean that if the government were to declare every Monday a Bank Holiday then the Country would have less sick people and statistically the Nation’s Health would look so much better?
It’s almost as if all the sick people had got better overnight and the hospital looked as if it was no more than an extravagant resource.

However, we all know this not to be true, and I am glad that the nurse [Sam], despite not getting paid overtime, was there to take my blood as the pathology lab at the local hospital I normally use had closed down for the Bank Holiday completely.

Now I am hoping that the results they get from my bloods are good enough to allow me to have chemotherapy tomorrow.

I have had much less pain in my back recently, due primarily to the chemo, although today I have had to use the top-up medication twice, something I have not had to do in almost a full week.

So far, so good.

2009-05-23T12:10:00.000+01:00

I am feeling as good as I have in a long time, naturally I still suffer from the effects of chemo, such as shortness of breath and my ankles still being swollen and sore, but the pains in my back are once again under control. I can smile inwardly as well as outwardly once again.

Chemotherapy - #1 of 3

2009-05-19T17:36:00.001+01:00

The best ever! One nurse, one attempt and the needle was in, no problem, thank you Marie for a wonderful job. I cannot say I enjoy having chemotherapy but if they all went like this it would be a pretty boring blog. Marie was so expert in administering the needle that I felt very little pain at all, in fact I felt less pain from that than I did the taking of bloods the day before.

One complaint I do have is against the three cars that did not care to wait in the queue like the rest of us and decided to use the ambulance lane just as one came along. If I was the car park attendant those car owners would be going back to flat tyres after their business at the hospital. I really wish there was something you could do about inconsiderate people like these, what if it had been them in the ambulance?
[Back on form with a good moan, must be feeling good]

Blood tests

2009-05-18T14:00:00.000+01:00

Too early for results from my blood tests today but if they are as good as the taking of bloods was then all bodes well for tomorrow’s chemotherapy.

I would like to say a quick thank you to everyone rooting for me and to those who pass-by this way and take the time to read all about my progress, especially those leaving messages. Thank you.

Oncology appointment

2009-05-14T14:55:00.001+01:00

It is more of the same, chemotherapy for three weeks and then a break for one week provided my blood levels do not continue to fall. I am overtly sensitive to the medication and therefore I may have to have yet a further reduction in strength. However, should I continue to improve through receiving chemo then they are aiming to ‘stabilize’ me with a view to giving me more time off therapy and a possible referral for the expensive and little known about Cyberknife treatment, which is not off the cards just yet.

I have been given some water tablets for my swollen ankles and will start on them tomorrow.

So, things are looking good at the moment and if I continue to improve as I have been doing then there is no reason why I cannot expect a better quality of life once again, but this time without overdoing things when I am feeling fine.

Anal GP

2009-05-12T12:12:00.000+01:00

Just as you turn the corner and you think things are on an even keel and that the pains are partially under control, enough to live by, when you get a phone call from a jumped up GP who believes he knows my pains better than me and obviously does not trust his colleague [my actual doctor] who did a medication review with us less than two weeks ago!

After getting onto me for taking ‘controlled’ drugs in such quantities, as cleared by the MacMillan nurse, the Oncologist Doctor at the hospital and my own GP he wants to cover his own arse and is more interested in the paperwork to say I am taking this medication. Why he hasn’t looked on the files they have on me or phoned the hospital I do not know but he sees it fit to upset me and insist that I supply the information his surgery should have before he prescribes any more medication.

My MacMillan nurse is now onto the surgery and I have said if it happens again I am taking the surgery through a complaints procedure until they get it into their tiny little minds that I need the medication to nullify the pains.

One of his concerns is that I could die in the night if I overdosed, he took a step back when I told him I was going to die anyway with or without the tablets that are there to make my life better, something phone calls like this do not do.

Chemotherapy session #3

2009-05-06T17:15:00.002+01:00

It has been a much better chemotherapy session today with just two attempts with the needle by the one nurse, the poor girl who has had to deal with me for the previous two weeks has had to attend me again today.
Although I am quite adamant that the needle will not go in either the back of my hand or arm they will insist on trying, but now she says she will listen to me in future as the first attempt in the back of the arm failed.

I am now hoping that the chemo will begin to do its magic as I have a week’s break between now and the next one in which time I can expect and appointment to see the Oncologist.

I have also been prescribed eye drops for an infection I picked up earlier in the week in both eyes and I expect them to be less sticky first thing in the morning.

I should have a wheelchair delivered tomorrow all being well but I would have to be ‘assessed’ on health and safety grounds to have a bath seat supplied because water is involved. I have instructed them to cancel the bath seat as I am not going to subject myself to being poked and prodded unnecessarily to satisfy some jobs-worth, red tape or H&S directive when I have been party to more than my fair share of examinations already.
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The laptop is still poorly and I am expecting an engineer to arrive tomorrow with a new hard drive or motherboard under his arm.

Laptop ill too.

2009-05-04T22:17:00.002+01:00

Just to let folks know that my laptop is knackered again and I have an engineer coming out on Thursday to fix it. I will try to get on when I can with updates.

This week is blood on Tuesday and Chemotherapy on Wednesday.

Speak soon

Feeling better today thank you all.

2009-05-04T11:55:00.001+01:00

I do believe that the chemo and increase in tablets is working or that the prayers of friends abroad and closer to home have been answered as I am feeling less pain of late. I have had a good couple of days over the weekend, although I did overdo it by planting out pots in the garden, I just needed to get out and do stuff for myself, and suffered the following day. I am much better again today, although a little tired, which is to be expected.
No blood tests today with it being bank holiday so they are put off until tomorrow, and the chemo session is now on Wednesday followed by one week off. Let’s just hope that it continues along this vein [excuse the pun].

Macmillan Nurse visit

2009-04-30T17:30:00.002+01:00

My assigned Macmillan Nurse, Anne, came to see us today for the first time in ages. She tends to leave us alone unless we request contact other than her calls to see how things are progressing. She is so thorough when she is here that we feel really well support and as if nothing is too much.
I am now on the list to receive a chair for the bath to ease me getting in and out of and also a wheelchair for when our jaunts to the Garden Centre or shops prove too much for my back. She has also increased my medication in-line with that already discussed as well as one other.

[She is now on the phone again as I type this, how uncanny is that? Clarification of my medication for the GP records]

She has also instructed me to apply for a Blue Badge to permit us to park in the allocated disabled parking zones in towns and shopping centres.

So you can see, she has just about every angle covered again for a while and like us is hoping the Chemo begins to work effectively, which today I may be so bold as to say may be improving.

Chemotherapy #2

2009-04-28T18:06:00.000+01:00

It was a horrendous start to the day for me as I spent most of night on the toilet whilst at the same time getting weaker and weaker. I awoke not wanting to get out of bed, trying to eat enough and drink enough fluids to get the body functioning.
It was an uphill struggle to get ready after a bath just to go to the Hospital for Chemo and I would never have done it without my partner who was there for me once again.

The chemo session did not go too well initially, four needle attempts and three different nurses this week, which is one more of each than last week.
Twice the needle was ‘in’ and twice it had to come out again, firstly because it was painful when the fluids began to flow and therefore incorrectly fitted, and secondly there was no ‘flash back’ that indicates that the needle is sat in the vein by getting blood to flow throw it.

I think, having had the same nurse two weeks running, that we may have given her a complex if not knocking her self esteem as it is difficult for them when it does not go to plan, especially if the patient is distressed or in pain.

I have also been instructed by the hospital doctor, in conjunction with my MacMillan nurse, to increase by pain killer at night and first thing in the morning.

Barium Meal Xray

2009-04-23T12:17:00.000+01:00

Approximately 40 years ago, as a young boy, I had a barium meal xray for which I was offered sixpence [2 ½p] if I drank all of the barium solution, which I did not.
And today at my second barium meal xray I did not finish all the solution either, how come it has not improved in all this time? Prior to the meal I had to have a spoon full of sherbet type medication that was swallowed down with a miniscule amount of fluid. I was stood up, lay down and rolled over in the machine until they could find a decent image to take, if they could not then they would ‘flood’ the area. I did not ask what they meant by that but I imagined enema and hoped that it worked, which thankfully it did, so ‘flooding’ was not necessary.
I guess I just await the results now and see what has been causing me to feel or be sick.

Return to Chemo

2009-04-21T17:28:00.001+01:00

First day back at Chemotherapy since February and it was not a good start to the day, I could drink or eat little without feeling sick. I slept most of the morning and it took me all my energy to get washed and dressed. I am not eating or drinking enough to sustain a grown man’s body. I am now down to 9st 9lbs.

Once at the hospital the inevitable happening and my veins went into hiding, warm water bucket and a heated pillow would not bring them out. Eventually, three needles and two nurses later, the needle was in and Chemo began. Fortunately I fell asleep for most of it so the half an hour passed by seemingly quickly. Now let’s hope it does its job and rids me of some of the pains.

On a brighter note I had an email from the Hotel and Spa we were at last week asking if I minded them putting my thank you letter up on their website. I naturally have no problem with that whatsoever as it was sent from the heart and everything in it was sincere and honest.
Don’t know when it will appear but here is the link to the Hotel’s website.
Feversham Arms Hotel and Verbena Spa

A welcome break before a return to normal

2009-04-17T13:43:00.000+01:00

We have just got back from a three night break at a fabulous hotel and spa in North Yorkshire at the Feversham Arms Hotel and spa. The staff could not be friendlier and the hotel any nicer, it is the nicest place I have ever stayed in.

Unfortunately I was not well enough to enjoy any of the Spa treatments and even had to miss one night of the Michelin Star restaurant food but I was able to relax and enjoy myself with the family in beautiful surroundings.

Now it is back to reality and I have to start Chemo again next week which will hopefully have an instant affect on the pains that have returned with vigour.

I am looking forward to a Barium meal xray even less than I am the chemo and I have one of those booked for next week also!

Health update

2009-04-09T15:05:00.000+01:00

The Bell’s Palsy is not getting any worse and you could say the same about me but it is still not getting any easier. I am able to get out of bed after breakfast and come down stairs but I am doing very little after that at the moment as the pains are getting worse.

I am back to using more of the OxyNorm medication as a top-up to combat the pain. We are on a break soon and I am hoping that my condition does not get any worse, I would be happy for it to get better but to be honest looking at it realistically I will settle for the former.

On a good note our family are all grand and our girls are busy getting on with their lives, which is how it should be. They were with us yesterday evening as we discussed the treatments they may want at the Hotel Spa we have arranged to go to. [I will post more about that around the time of going.]

Alarm Bell’s, not really.

2009-04-03T17:56:00.001+01:00

Two trips to the doctors today, the first one was a routine appointment to get my medication for Hiatus Hernia changed to something stronger. The other was a last minute appointment due to a loss of facial control around the right side of my mouth which we naturally first associated with a stroke.
However, after examination, my GP believes this may be the onset of a form of Bells’ Palsy. Here is a link if it doesn’t ring a bell! Patient UK, Bell’s Palsy.
Whatever next?

Appointment with Oncology Doctor – good news/bad news

2009-04-02T16:36:00.000+01:00

We had no idea what to expect from today’s appointment and came away with both bad and good news.

The bad news is that chemotherapy will be reintroduced sometime around Easter as I need to ‘stabilize’ my condition and have my stomach investigated for causes of the bouts of sickness I have experienced of late.

The good news is that if I can stabilize myself and have any ‘blockage’ or restriction in my stomach relieved then they will consider sending a request to London for possible Cyberknife treatment.

It would appear that the sickness may be due to pressure on the stomach, could be from the tumour, or that there is now a problem within the stomach that needs further investigation. For this the doctor has suggested an x-ray with a tracer dye to highlight any possible causes.

I now await an appointment date for chemotherapy and the x-ray.

A pattern I hope that is not being set!

2009-03-29T17:21:00.001+01:00

Just as I was last week whilst on holiday I was violently sick again in the early hours of the morning and I could feel it coming on from late afternoon. I tried having a bath to alleviate the pains in my back, which were not helping at all, and then went to bed early despite us having friends around following our daughter’s fourth birthday party.

I was again frightened to be sick in case it contained blood and I hate the feeling of being sick as most people do but more so since having chemotherapy.
Once again once I had vomited it did clear the nausea, naturally, as well as some of the pressure on my stomach that was increasing the pains in the back.

I am due routine blood tests tomorrow with a view to starting chemotherapy within the next week or two. I also have an appointment with my Oncology Doctor on Thursday and I will ask if this is a pattern of events that goes with Pancreatic Cancer and if it is one I can now expect. If so then I will just have to get used to being continually sick once again.

Too good to last

2009-03-25T16:55:00.000Z

Two days into a really good five day holiday break in the Forest and I knew things were going too well. As a combination of overdoing it and eating rich food I was extremely ill this morning to the point where I was as sick as I have ever been in my entire life. It is late afternoon now and I am only just out of bed feeling washed-out. Thankfully I had my family, especially my wife Zoe, to help me out this morning and throw me straight into the shower as she did the job of cleaning up after me. I still count myself lucky for having my family around me on holiday but last night was one of these times you wish you were in the comfort of your own home. The girls are currently off swimming now having spent the morning on horse-riding lessons, including the first ever time on a horse for our nearly four year old.

I have been putting off, or at least trying to put of actually vomiting due to a fear of finding blood or something worse but now I will not be so reluctant to get it out and get on with feeling better.

Another extremely rough night

2009-03-22T13:51:00.003Z

Another one of those infuriating nights where I thought it would never come to an end and with each time I had to get out of bed to use the toilet I became gradually weaker to the point where I was almost too tired to even bother.
I knew I was going to suffer this morning and I have from being so lethargic and extremely tired, even getting items of clothing out of the cupboards was too large a task.

To top it all Jade Goody, the ‘star’ of reality TV has lost her well documented fight against Cancer. I only hope her family are left to grieve in peace and that they themselves treat the situation with dignity.
She thankfully, according to the reports, died peacefully in her sleep and to be honest it is one of the things I hope can be said about me.

On a happier note we are due to go away for a short mid-week break with our four daughters in a lodge in the forest and we are hoping to recharge our batteries before I inevitably start Chemotherapy again.
Is it inevitable? Well it is if the consultant has been honest with us as I am due to re-start if the pains return and it is only now, after almost four weeks without chemo, that I am beginning to feel a little of the old pains once again.

Evening got worse.

2009-03-16T10:19:00.001Z

Sunday night didn’t get any better, in fact it got worse and I ended up in bed for seven o’clock and then spent a while on the bathroom floor expecting to be sick, which thankfully I wasn’t [the thought of having a show of blood scares me shitless to be honest].
I believe I can attribute these bouts of sickness to bending down as that appears to be the one thing in common each time I have felt this way and I may be putting pressure on either the tumour or organs around the stomach.

Weekends seem to be the same - Sunday 15 March

2009-03-15T10:07:00.003Z

They appear to be the same in as much that I am on a regular basis feeling crap at least once over the weekend that takes it out of me; last night was no exception.
I went to bed early after needing a bath due to back pains, unsure if they are due to the Cancer or the allotment digging on Friday. I felt sick, but thankfully once again I was able to stave them off with tablets. I did spend some time on the toilet though that left me dehydrated and drained again this morning.
I am hoping to rally around again when Alice and her friend Jen from University come to take me to the garden centre later.
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Contributing to Comic Relief Red Nose Day made me feel a whole lot better so if you haven’t already then please do give, as generously as you can.

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Also, even if you are not one of my regular readers, or not a blogger, but you are a friend old or new please feel free to leave a comment, it is nice to hear from folk when I am on the internet, which is most days now.

Another knock

2009-03-11T18:16:00.001Z

Felt really rough last night with sickness and stomach ache keeping me awake for a good part of the night. Sickness came on for no reason just as I was about to go to bed so I can only put the whole thing down to something I must have eaten.
I am hoping to feel better later today as I should be out with friends for eats and need to get myself up to speed as I feel weak with it once again.

Now that it is early evening I am feeling better as we get ready to go out but my stomach has been strained with the pains etc. I am once again indebted to Zoe for caring for me and getting to grips with things that need doing, such as arrangements for a break away and the next round of decorating, this time the kitchen.

Time off

2009-03-10T09:52:00.000Z

Apart from the shortness of breath and the occasional bout of nausea I am not feeling too bad at all. Thankfully I am being told, instructed or just left to get on with doing very little, which is good for my body but not for my mind. We are soon to go out to pick a carpet so I can at least feel a little useful in that sense, other than that it is difficult doing nothing but necessary unless I want to be laid up in bed once again. I am enjoying a relatively pain-free existence at the moment and I am not suffering from the lack of chemotherapy.

If you hate your job right now, or the person next to you or the co-worker who is standing in your way it really isn’t all that important in the scheme of things; having wished for so long to escape the chains of the workplace I would gladly change places with most of you.

Being at home does have its benefits though and in good health I am sure it would be so different but for us, for now, we are making the most of this time off together and despite the difficulties I like being retired; if you can afford it, try it.

Quite literally knocked off ones feet

2009-03-07T14:53:00.003Z

Friday morning I awoke not able to walk the five paces to the en suite bathroom and had to make such an effort just to get back onto the bed. The rest of day got even worse as I struggled for breath, the fumes from freshly decorated paintwork not helping. My legs had continual cramps and I could not get settled at all, the only respite, when it came, was from sleep and lots of it.
I felt like a new born at times unable to open my eyes and then when I did I was unable to focus.
Even now a day later I am so below par. In the bath this morning, following a severe bout of diarrhoea, I look so skeletal as the weight has just dropped from my once muscular legs, it is pitiful to see.
I have been so emotional too at the merest thought of what is going on with us all at the moment setting me off and just the thought of my wonderful family again too much to bear.

On a lighter note, for those of you in the know, we are just getting over our day on TV and are looking forward to the gift awarded to us by the Duchess of York for a family stay at a health farm as way of saying thank you to my family for all the care, love and attention they give me.

It is all looking good at the moment.

2009-03-04T10:38:00.001Z

The only updates I have at the moment are that there isn’t any. I am still feeling relatively well and life without Chemo currently is pretty good. I am in the middle of surprising my partner and family with something as a way of saying thank you, but more of that tomorrow, or the day after...

Positive results from Scan

2009-02-27T15:15:00.001Z

Well! What can I say and where do I start?
We naturally approached today’s appointment with more than a little trepidation and were extremely anxious in case we were going to get some news we had not anticipated from the Scan results of last week.

Not only was the news good but it just got better as the appointment progressed.
Firstly the tumour is now, after chemotherapy, half the size it was in just over seven weeks since treatment began. This far exceeded their expectations let alone ours. As a result I am now free from Chemotherapy for at least three weeks, unless the pains come back in which case I can phone to have more therapy arranged.

Secondly I also thought I would chance my arm in asking, as I knew many before me would’ve already asked, about a relatively new form of therapy to the UK known as Cyberknife. I read about this on a cancer social network site I had joined and thought I would enquire however I did not expect the reaction I received, which again was positive. The Oncologist has agreed to look further into my case to see if I am a possible candidate for the procedure as part of the start of clinical trials.

Cyberknife is only available in one clinic in the country and it is in the private sector in London but I have to be willing to pay for this should it be feasible. It will not cure but if it were possible it would increase the length of my life.
We are hoping that I am indeed eligible for this type of treatment that uses radiotherapy but much more localised than the current forms of radiotherapy treatment in use.

What a day, what a wonderful day.
This is yet another day whereby I cannot knock the NHS in the UK and once again I am truly indebted to them.

Wendy Richard dies 65

2009-02-26T17:04:00.001Z

It is sad when anyone dies from a terminal illness and when they are in the public eye it just brings it home how vulnerable we all are. Wendy Richard has passed away following terminal cancer and my thoughts and wishes go to those she leaves behind, especially her husband.

A welcome break from treatment

2009-02-25T13:29:00.000Z

I feel so much better for not having gone for Chemo yesterday, I am still tired and run out of breath easily, as shown this morning whilst helping Zoe put down a base for our new greenhouse, but I can cope with that for now.
I am relatively pain free compared to how I was a while ago so from that point of view chemo treatment has been quite successful. I hope this coming Friday, when I meet the Oncology doctor that she also confirms the effectiveness of the treatment and that it is indeed working.
I guess it also helps psychologically knowing that I do not have to fight with the needles and veins and the nausea that follows.

Sweet Dreams, if only

2009-02-21T10:05:00.002Z

From good customer service through both DELL and my friend Joe when repairing and restoring my laptop we went to the other extreme this morning when one of two delivery men was as arrogant and obnoxious as they come and was the biggest ever jobs-worth I have seen in a long time.
The bed they were delivering would not go around the banister to the loft unless they took it out of the box, which they refused to do. If we took it out of the box ourselves and then it still would not go they refused to take the bed back. I sent them packing and phoned the showroom.
The salesman there has been onto his customer service department and the delivery is on its way back to us. If they cannot get it up the loft the salesman says he will! I wait with baited breath.

To quote their own website... ‘Don’t think of [us] ...as just another bed shop. We're much more than that. We're Britains leading Bed Specialist with over 180 bed superstores nationwide. We deliver thousands of beds every week right across the country and we like to be different... 'different' as in better.’
Well, so far they have certainly been different!

Or put differently DREAM(s) on...

CT Scan, pre-review

2009-02-19T20:42:00.001Z

The CT Scan was quite emotional for me as I knew the needle would not go in that easily and it is one thing having a caring oncology nurse painstakingly search 20 minutes for a vein to having an x-ray nurse go for the first vein she can see and then continue pushing it into ‘hardened’ veins until you cry out in pain!

Of course by then my emotions are completely shot.

Still, it is over and done with for now and I will receive the results next week when I see my oncology Doctor for the review.

I now need to get some rest and sleep, quite a harrowing week.

Chemotherapy #7 [7/7]

2009-02-18T11:44:00.000Z

Chemotherapy went very well today considering I could feel myself getting wound up by it all. Nurse Marie was superb and very patient with my veins and when eventually in the vein it was easy from there on in.
I have been tired, as expected, and emotional, especially when my laptop busted yesterday. I now have to wait for it to be repaired and I am relying upon sharing with step-daughter, thank you to her.
I will be on from time to time and keep folks posted as and when I can get access to laptop. I have CT scan this coming Thursday and then I am due to see consultant next week for a review.
Good luck to anyone going through similar to me, famous, liked, disliked or otherwise, no one deserves to have this illness so please send your prayers or thoughts to everyone with this or similar illnesses.

Swollen feet and ankles

2009-02-14T21:40:00.001Z

If it is not wrists then it is feet; today I have feet the size of a Hobbits as my ankles are swollen beyond recognition, I hate them, and despite having them raised most of the day they are still up. I wish there was something I could do to combat them but there is not a lot can be done apparently.

Not limp wristed

2009-02-13T20:14:00.001Z

I would have to even more unlucky health-wise than I am now to have bone cancer in the same place on the opposite wrist as I did in 1992 but this morning I found a rather large lump on my left wrist. Thankfully, after visiting my GP, it appears to be nothing more than a cyst of some description [It can be moved, painfully, which means it is not adhered to the bone in anyway].

I have an appointment for a CT scan next Friday before seeing the Oncologist the following week for another review.

Sweet dreams

2009-02-12T09:36:00.000Z

I had such a wonderful deep sleep, only waking once to use the toilet, that I had several deep dreams. I am used to experiencing hallucinations nowadays and talking to people whist asleep so it is was so unusual and most satisifying to have real dreams.

Chemotherapy #6 [6/7] – Another good one for me, but not for some

2009-02-10T18:32:00.000Z

Once again I had Nurse Donna attend to my chemotherapy session and it went off without a hitch, well apart from them not allowing my youngest daughter in the chemo suite. We had to drag my eldest daughter kicking and screaming out of work to come and pick her up from us. [OK, she relished the chance to get out of work an hour early and then be treated to a MacDonald’s meal; I have a penchant for them after Chemo and picked one up for everyone].

Another poor lady patient was not having it so easy and was where I was at a week or so ago when it mattered not what was said to her she was going to break out into tears, she was at the end of her tether and it was difficult to watch. I also know that nothing I or anyone else said to her would not make one iota of difference. I just wish she was as fortunate as me in having someone like my wife around. It makes so much difference and I know without her I would find it so much harder than it already is.

Monday blood tests

2009-02-09T14:58:00.000Z

I jumped the queue again today ahead of all the other poor souls in the cold wet waiting room. I do not feel too bad getting in before them even though they have to wait longer but I cannot risk picking up any virus. The blood-letting nurse was pretty good, barely a nick felt.

Cancer support website

2009-02-06T19:24:00.000Z

I joined this site tonight after seeing it featured on the BBC evening TV news, very much worth a look for fellow sufferers.
http://no-surrender-network.org/

The man needs a new jacket

2009-02-06T12:32:00.003Z

I am a great believer in Fredom of Speech within reason, within whose reason is always a little tricky; so when Jeremy Clarkson the Top Gear presenter slanders the PM Gordon Brown I cannot lose too much sleep about it because within my reasoning he has a right to his comments, so dont call for the the talentless bigot to be taken off the air just hit the off-switch on the TV remote, it is about time Clarkson was outed for what he is, an Ape in an ill fitting suit jacket.

In Clarkson's defence I know how much better he must feel for getting something off his hairy chest because I feel so much better for having said my piece.

Chemotherapy #5 [5/7] – What a difference

2009-02-03T18:27:00.001Z

I felt so much more relaxed going into hospital today as I have been feeling better than I had in months. I was less tired and relatively pain free and quite a number of the nurses commented on how well I was looking.
What was even better was the treatment itself which went without a hitch and the nurse, Donna, was almost as pleased and relieved as I was that it did. I left hospital with a spring in my step.
I am now hoping that with a reduced dosage, as recommended by the Doctor on Friday, will not bring on too much nausea or drowsiness.
_______________________________________

This Country is hopeless when it comes to dealing with an overnight downfall of snow. Thousands of schools have been closed today as the town bore witness to gangs of kids hanging around the shopping centre with nothing else to do. I remember as a lad walking to school in a foot or more of snow with no question of the school closing. Whatever happened to that fighting spirit we were so renowned for around the World?]

Mid chemo review – Friday 30 January 2009

2009-02-01T11:44:00.000Z

We went to the hospital for a mid chemo review not knowing what to expect from the consultant so we were somewhat relieved when she told us the tumour was reacting well to the chemo. She was concerned about the side effects of the treatment that were making me so tired and has as a result decided to reduce chemo dosage for the next session.

The plan of action now is to finish the seven chemo sessions if possible and then to continue with treatment on a three weekly basis with one week off in between.

I had the best night’s sleep in ages on Friday.

Chemotherapy #4 [4/7] – Better luck this time around

2009-01-28T12:09:00.000Z

Well, my blood counts were fine but there is a problem with my liver that I may find out more about this Friday as I have an appointment with the specialist arranged for then. It is classed as a chemotherapy review and I am hoping this is just routine practice and not because of any other underlying problems. This time around the chemotherapy and needle insertion was for me relatively easy, even easier than for the lady in the next bay to me who also struggles with her veins. We were in a side room away from the other patients, and I am left thinking was this coincidence or was it for a reason? It may have been for our own comfort and to make it less traumatic that we were segregated.

Today I am struggling with extreme pains in my stomach, let’s hope the hot water bottle that is sat on my lap does the trick and helps to alleviate the pain.

Chemotherapy #4 [4/7] – Did not take place

2009-01-20T19:28:00.002Z

I received a phone call this morning from the Oncology unit to be told that my blood counts were too low for me to have Chemotherapy today. I have been shivering and cold as described by the nurse on the phone and I have been feeling rather low again.
I did have my doubts about whether I would be able to have it as I have been keeping my eye on my blood pressure, I in BP machine. I also need to monitor my body temperature, which is also on the low side.
I may have to contact the hospital or my GP tomorrow if things have not improved overnight. In the meantime it is continued rest and relaxation, a very difficult concept for someone who is usually a little more active.

______________________________

On a bigger scale it has been a good day

It is a good day for the World [well let’s at least hold that hope for a moment] as the US have inaugurated not only their first Black President but also someone who appears to be in touch with World events, both economical and diplomatic - traits that appeared to be missing in the previous incumbent and his administration.
It’s a day to say good-riddance to Bush and one in which to welcome Obama with an open mind without putting pressure on him to change things quickly, the World has been hurt and is still smarting from decisions even we were fool enough to be dragged along by. Now let us all move slowly and with care to repair the damage and like all most medicines it can be a bitter pill to swallow.

Blood test – pre chemo

2009-01-19T17:20:00.001Z

I cannot begin to tell you how relieved I was not to have to wait in the queue with everyone else to have my blood taken today. I was informed last week that as a chemotherapy patient I did not have to take a ticket and wait. I put it to the test in a full waiting room as I just stood waiting for an available pathology nurse. The looks I got when I went straight in were to die for! [Excuse the pun].
The staff are so sympathetic towards me when they go to take blood, my arms are as thin as they possibly could be and are full of holes and marks left by the plasters that have covered them [they are a pig to wash off].

I have been feeling pretty low all weekend despite the transfusion on Friday and I am not expecting my blood counts and levels to be that good for tomorrow.

I also took the opportunity of returning the TENS machine to the hospital that I was so kindly given on loan when I required it for the pains in my back. I signed myself off from the Pain Clinic now that I am being tended to by the Cancer ward at the University City hospital.

Blood Transfusion 16 January 2009

2009-01-17T14:34:00.000Z

Yesterday’s transfusion was not without its problems, namely the needle not going in once again. We had a nurse who was working overtime in the Ward to gain a little extra cash and she had come down from the Pathology lab so if anyone should find a vein it is she. Eventually we did, only this time we used the right arm instead of the left. Other medical professionals are usually reluctant to use the right arm because of the extensive surgery that was carried out on it many years ago [right distal ulna partially removed].
Added to the problem with the needle was the malfunction of part of the blood bag that meant a second nurse and the floor both got covered in blood.
Once it was in and settled I gave way to thoughts of the blood belonging to my 18 year old daughter [It made me feel more comfortable believing it had come from someone so close who is as fit as a fiddle] since she has recently began to donate; we are both part of a rare blood group.
I had two units [two bags, no idea how much was in each] spread over four hours, two hours per bag.

It was a good job I took a film in to watch on my portable DVD player; ‘Adaptation’ starring Nicolas Cage and Meryl Streep. – a definite 9 out 10 from me for this one. I loved ‘Being John Malkovich’ so I guess it is only natural to love this too.

But I digress; this is not film review site...

So, the blood test was supposed to be an instant tonic and give the boost I required to at least feel near to ‘normal’ again. When we got home, around late afternoon time, I fell asleep on the settee and was not woken-up until it was time for me to go to bed, where I slept extremely well until this morning and then, after breakfast, I fell asleep on the settee. I cannot believe for one minute that the blood yesterday was that belonging to my daughter and I would even question it being human at all! More likely to be that of a Sloth or a tortoise.

Chemotherapy #3 [3/7]

2009-01-13T21:54:00.002Z

Definitely the worse one yet!

My veins appear to close down the minute Chemotherapy is administered and no longer wish to play ball. It took at least six, if not seven, long and painful attempts to get a needle in and then once there for it to function properly.

My Haemoglobin is on the low side and as a result so am I, both emotionally and physically.
For no apparent reason I could cry my eyes out and there is no way I can prevent it from occurring; this is embarrassing for a grown man! It first happened this morning when I stepped on the weighing scales and discovered that with yet more weight loss I am now only 10 st 1 ½ lbs. [141.5 lbs]. I nearly filled the bath I was running with tears instead of the hot water from the central heating system.
All I could think of was the poor people who were sent to concentration camps during WWII and how they must have felt about themselves. I cannot even begin to imagine how low their self esteem must have been with how emaciated they were.

During many attempts to have the needle inserted both my partner and I broke out into tears as I thought of the girl who had cancer at the same time I did in 1992 and all the sad memories of that time came rushing back. It is not how I usually remember her as I am still in contact with her family, despite the fact that she never made it through in ’93, and her lovely sister is so effervescent. [She is also rather round in the belly department as her first born is reluctant to make an appearance].

I am booked in for a blood transfusion on Friday to help me get back on my feet, provided they can get a needle in that is!

Chemotherapy #2 [2/7]

2009-01-07T10:33:00.003Z

The whole procedure is so much easier when the needle goes in first time, albeit a little painful as the nurse, Sam, was not as skilful as Rose from last week in inserting the needle for the cannula.
The session went that quickly that I was only able to watch one program from the first series of ‘The Likely Lads’. I have felt a little nauseous since yesterday but I will not know the full extent of side effects until later in the week, I will endeavour to keep you posted.

Saturday 03 January 2009, four days after Chemo #1

2009-01-03T14:16:00.000Z

For anyone else going through the same as me, or similar, take heart the Chemotherapy, that nearly killed me sixteen years ago, is this time doing me some good, in-as-much that it has taken some of the pains away. I have yet to be sick, it is still early days, although I am even more tired than I have been of late, if that is at all possible!I am not dreading the thought of having more treatment on Tuesday as I thought I would be because to be free of the pains, despite the generally feeling of being unwell, is wonderful.

Chemotherapy #1 [1/7]

2008-12-30T18:15:00.001Z

Chemo #1 did not pass without its problems, namely the Cannula [the needle and vent flow they put in the back of the hand] and the vein on the back of my hand not acting as they should. Firstly the vein would not play ball and did not wish to show its ugly head, despite being plunged and soaked in hot water before hand, then as I hit it a few times with my other hand it soon jumped to the foreground. Thus the needle in the cannula had a target to hit, but once in it also did not go to plan

Having gone through all the routine and necessary paperwork with Nurse Rachel I was ‘flushed’ through the arm with a saline solution before the Chemo was due to be connected. Whilst I was being flushed I was informed of what to expect with regards to the possible side effects of the therapy, should I be so unlucky as to get them.
The needle in the cannula began to hurt the moment the Chemo was introduced into the system and into my arm. After several attempts it was decided to re-cannulate further up the arm, this time with much more success using Sister Rose’s lucky tourniquet.

Although the injection of the treatment lasted approximately ½ hour we were there for at least two hours, most of the time being taken up with the cannula problems and the filling and cross checking of paperwork.

Naturally having gone through this process many years ago, and having suffered quite badly at the hands of Chemotherapy, I was quite uptight and apprehensive throughout the whole process.

I am now at home and I wait for the side effects to take effect, because let’s face it, given my luck, it is bound to happen.

I have very little hair to lose so that does not worry me, unfortunately I have little to lose from my stomach since I am not eating as well as I might so I am hoping that the anti-sickness tablets supplied do their work.

Subsequent chemo sessions are booked for every Tuesday over the next seven weeks should I be fortunate enough for them to work and have no adverse side effects.

Chemotherapy day today #1

2008-12-30T13:13:00.000Z

It is Chemotherapy day today and I have been feeling worse than ever over the last day or two. I am hoping that the treatment is nothing like that I had in 1992 and that it goes someway to improving my condition as opposed to killing me.

When I have managed to sleep through the night I have awoke in the morning in so much pain that I have come very close, on two occasions, to calling for an ambulance. I am also experiencing a degree of pain not known until now that affects both my back and stomach. Added to this is my continued weight loss, I am now down to under 10 st 4lbs [144lbs] which makes me lethargic and full of aches in every joint in my body.

I am having trouble eating any amount of food and it causing my hiatus hernia to give me some grief.

We are all hoping that the Chemo works but my partner is taking no chances and has bought a new bucket for the journey home in the car just in case I am sick! Now there’s confidence for you.

Have a good one too.

2008-12-23T16:07:00.002Z

Well, Christmas is almost upon us with only two more sleeps to go before Santa.

Unfortunately for me the night-time pains as it nears Christmas are getting worse; in fact they are pretty much bad throughout the day, especially today.
To top that I cricked my back assisting my mother out of the car after she had took us shopping at her local butchers for our Christmas meat, Turkey and Beef.
On route we popped into the Cancer wing at the hospital that I will be attending for Chemotherapy on 30 December to have some blood tests taken. Having been on the Oncology ward I am a little less apprehensive about going in for treatment. It appeared to be run in a very friendly and relaxed atmosphere as everyone sat round in comfortable chairs whilst receiving their Chemo. It would appear that friends and family are encouraged to stay and sit with their loved ones ; that has pleased my partner no end.
So, although we are not looking forward to any potential side effects we are optimistic that it will do me some good and help prolong my time with the family.
We are looking forward to our Christmas so much now that we have all the presents bought and wrapped. It was such a daunting time when we were first told that I was terminally ill and even reaching Christmas was an unknown. We are now that close to it I can almost feel the breath from the Reindeer upon my cheeks and it looks very much like my own Christmas wish is about to come true; to see the faces of our Girls when they open their unexpected, last minute presents.
Now that we are in a state of merriment even without the influence of alcohol may we wish you all a very Merry Christmas.

No hospital visits for a while, I am hoping

2008-12-15T10:08:00.000Z

Barring accidents and any changes in my current state of health I do not have to attend hospital until after the Christmas break. I am however due for Chemotherapy on December 30. The Chemo will be administered as for Pancreatic Cancer because the hospital still does not know what type of Cancer I have. I am chasing this line of enquiry with the hospital I first attended for Cancer back in 1992 as they are the ones who are apparently best able to ascertain what I have.

Had we got more than 10 days to go before Christmas day I would seriously be considering going through with the Pain Management Consultants offer of a procedure to kill some nerve endings using needles and pure alcohol to lessen the pains in my back.

Mentally I guess the pains do get to me at times although I think I am holding it together pretty well and if we don’t think too much about the eventual outcome we are able to enjoy the run up to Christmas and look forward to the day itself. I just hope that the day after doesn’t just become an anti-climax.

Death of the laptop..

2008-12-08T16:48:00.001Z

Gosh, it really has been a day or two since I last posted. It's not that I have nothing to say or report because I do, and more of that later, it is just that the my laptop gave up the ghost and packed in altogether [I should've noticed the signs; flickering screen, battery not recharging, getting slower, etc.] It has been given a health check and will be buried soon!

I now have a new laptop, purchased today [Dell], and this is virtually the first thing I have done to it, besides reconnect to wireless, get rid of Norton Anti virus for something reliable and practicle.

So, I apologise to myself and my readers [that makes three of us at least] and I will get on later in the week with updates on hosptial visits and general state of health.

Medical Early Retirement

2008-12-03T14:21:00.000Z

We were expecting, and got, a visit from HR and management to discuss my leaving options. The transition from employee to ex-employee was a relatively painless one other than emotionally as the realisation now begins to sink in.

It is really painful for me to type this as I am trying to hold back my emotions. I am indeed worth a good deal in monetary terms dead but it will never replace a Dad and Stepdad for our children.

As of this Friday I will cease my employment with the company I began working for as an apprentice 32 years and 3 months ago. I should be jumping with joy at the thought of never having to work again but I would change anything to get out of this and return to work for another 100 years in order to spend more time with my family. Give me extra turns at the furnaces of Hell in return for Christmas, after that any day would be a bonus.

Hospice visit

2008-11-25T18:50:00.003Z

We had an appointment today at the local Hospice, Mary Ann Evans Hospice, named after the author who went under the pseudonym of George Eliot [1819-1880]. I was mistaken as being my partner’s Dad by the receptionist, which really made me feel good in already uncomfortable surroundings. Although the Hospice itself was clean and tidy and the people noisy and jovial the thought of sick people there waiting to die made me restless. My groundings for this were totally unfounded as we were later informed that there were no ‘beds’ as such in the hospice and it was an ‘open in the morning, shut in the afternoon’ establishment. I felt more at ease once I discovered this.

The Macmillan Doctor, who appeared young enough to be my grand daughter let alone a daughter, had a wonderful bedside manner and was very helpful in examining me and prescribing alternatives to the primary pain killer medication I have been taking.

I am now, after more confusion with the GP surgery over the prescription request, on OxyContin [prolonged release] and OxyNorm [quick release] instead of the morphine based medication. The thinking behind this is that I will receive pain relief on a much more effective basis and I should experience no pain at all from my lower back and ribs [RH front]. The other alternative to this, should it not work, is to have nerved block administered by a procedure involving needles [I am surmising most of the needle bit as I have not yet opted for or been informed of its true nature.]

My wife has once again run around like a fly with an arse the colour of the sky all day getting my medication sorted.

*Mary Ann Evans Hospice, - stands in the grounds of the George Eliot hospital.

Results of the biopsy, inconclusive.

2008-11-19T08:38:00.000Z

We went to the Hospital today expecting to get the definitive results from last Wednesday's CT biopsy. Unfortunately the biopsy, like the one previous, has proved to be inconclusive.

The final outcome will remain the same, the tumour is inoperable and I will continue to receive palliative care, however they still do not know what type of cancer it is and the fact that it still may be related to the previous two outbreaks has not been ruled out.
It is looking more likely that it is indeed related to the rare cancer [Malignant fibrous histiocytoma] I had back in 1992 than it is pancreatic cancer.

The Oncology department cannot administer or recommend Chemotherapy until they know what type of Cancer I have.

As a result of these latest findings the University Hospital are forwarding all their results from biopsies and scans to the ROH in Birmingham [UK] for further review.

In the meantime my painkillers have once again been increased and hopefully will be reviewed again by a Macmillan Doctor sometime next week.

I have also been given some drinks to build me up so I can cope with Chemotherapy should it become necessary. Unfortunately none of the drinks are stout flavoured!

We are off to Cadbury's world today all being well. I know that Disney is a favourite for people who are terminally ill, but hey, I like chocolate.

Getting up to date - Selected extracts from personal diary

2008-11-15T11:06:00.007Z

Monday 27 October 2008 – Suited and booted
On Saturday I picked up a suit from The Cancer Research charity shop to wear for the wedding, today I have put this to one side as I have been fully kitted out in brilliant outfit, suit, shirt, tie, belt and shoes for a remarkable price and I shall look, and therefore feel, like a million dollars.

Although we have heard from the hospital we are still no further forward from finding out what the diagnosis is, but have been promised an appointment before the wedding date of the 7 November 2008

The pains, and management of them, is still no better and I have made yet another appointment, this time preferring to speak to my own GP via a phone call about increasing the daily intake of morphine.

Too busy, for better or for worse
I haven’t left you all yet, I have been too busy either living or getting on with being prodded and poked at the hospital, the latest being a CT scan biossy, which was not a very nice procedure at all! I promise to have more to say about this one later but for now, after yesterday at the hospital, I am determined to get busy being happily married.

I love being married to Zoe as we try to make the most of every day we have whilst still having to do all the mundane and boring things in life, including the sorting out of insurance and paperwork during this difficult period.

I am hoping to post health updates on here very soon.

_______________________________________

Saturday 01 November 2008
What will this month bring? Tension and cracks beginning to show as the final ‘important’ people are informed…

…Colleague/friend from work has proven to be a real let down as he has not bothered to pick up the phone. In contrast an old stalwart of a friend “broke” down on Friday when I informed him via phone call [In hindsight the use of phone was not a good medium to inform him].

Sunday 02 November 2008
J&T arrived from Derby still unaware, despite the obvious gravity in Zoe’s voice etc, the seriousness of the situation. They soon grasped it once they were told of the diagnosis, and as best we have the prognosis. I think the word TERMINAL does it.

…It was quite harrowing with the last of my daughters to be told as she has so many ‘fundamental’ questions – none of which can be answered. Why you Dad? Why Now?

…It has been a very heavy couple of days and it has left us feeling just a little beaten-up by everything. The worse part is to have to tell people, and telling the ones you love first is even worse than that.

Sunday 02 November 2008
Today [Sunday] we are having a rest from deliberately informing folk, unless we happen to bump into someone we shall not be going out of our way to seek people out.
Tomorrow [Monday] will be bad enough when we have to tell my best friend from the office at work.

…Itching at a minimum through the night. No additional medications taken either.

20.00 – It has just once again dawned upon me that I shall never be returning to my place of work. I remember a manager leaving work to go for a routine check-up at hospital and asking me for change for the Car Park, notoriously expensive and with extremely elusive parking spaces. He never returned to work and was dead within a week. I at least have the satisfaction of knowing, although not in the best of circumstances, that I have, or will have, officially left work early!!

…It has been a very heavy couple of days and it has left us feeling just a little beaten-up by everything. The worse part is to have to tell people, and telling the ones you love first is even worse than that.

…19.30 – The house is a mess, it is also very warm central heating is On! I am getting irritated by almost anything at this precise time. Especially with people who are talking at me instead of listening. I am NOT infirm yet!

…Feeling extremely tired with head full of finance and unknowns.
Still not ready to explode yet!

Another Month, but how many more?
Today’s symptoms: 08 November 2008
The medication now being taken is just so far removed from that which I am now taking that it is not worth me noting them here at the moment, I will log all that I am on later as the Morphine, in both tablet and liquid form increases.

General – The Jaundice has all but disappeared, naturally I am still scratching a little but I guess that is only to be expected.
[Extract from personal diary]

One of the most frightening things about the week has been the increase in Morphine and its subsequent affects on the week. I now have absolutely no idea what time of day it is, what day of the week it is, or which conversation I am having. I am totally out-of-it at times, Yippie.

Thursday 30 - The gloves are on, off
I am now into wearing white cotton gloves to stop me from scratching a much as I have been. My tablet regime is much stricter and more controlled now that my partner has taken over the administration of them. My typing is, at times, hopeless. [I do take the gloves off for typing, lol]

Friday 24 October 2008 – Just some of the frustrations…

2008-11-15T09:23:00.007Z

because…

The itching has not abated at all, day or night

A phone call from the hospital tells us we may not know any results for at least another 2 weeks, if not six!

I am getting tetchier than ever

My painkillers are once again having to be changed to increase the Morphine therefore I have had to chase up more unexpected prescriptions from the GP.

I have been more ill due to the Jaundice than previously imagined.

I cannot help but believe that someone is holding something back from us despite reassurances that they are not.

Sing out, sing along, I love you Zoe...

2008-11-07T11:24:00.001Z

I'm going to the Chapel and I'm going to get married...

Lots going on, but no writing on the wall

2008-11-06T08:36:00.001Z

Congratulations to the US and Barack Obama on the most watchable of all elections, I sat up until the early hours yesterday waiting for the results and I was not disappointed by the outcome.
________________________________________________

I will be posting on here again soon, I am still keeping a diary of my progress with health issues, however I will not be posting until after the weekend when I will once again be made an honest man when I get Married on Friday to a truly wonderful woman.

Friday 24 October 2008 – When will we know?

2008-10-24T18:07:00.000+01:00

We have been told today that due to me being so ill with the Jaundice that no decision can be made as to the course of treatment to be taken next and as a consequence we may have to wait yet another 2-6 weeks before knowing. What is puzzling us right now is that no mention has been made either to the results of recent biopsies and we still have not been told if it is Cancer for sure or just a Cyst.

As the pains in my back [RH] get worse so my dosage of Morphine and Oramorph increases also and it now transpires that I will probably end up on more of these two forms of medication than any other pain killer.

As Ibrupofen was prescribed to us an afterthought a little while ago we have decided to take this out of the equation altogether and not use it as it is only confuses us more. I am supposed to be taking this with food but this was never properly explained otherwise it can cause internal bleeding.

The itching continues with vengeance and I do not look forward to getting into bed as I wake every two hours or so.

One and the same

2008-10-22T14:29:00.000+01:00

As from today I have decided that rather than have nothing to post on here because I am too busy getting on with living then I should try and combine my two blogs and just post on the one of them. So from here on in an entry in blue is my usual moan blog and the other in black will be my Living with Cancer entry.

If possible enjoy!

Tuesday 21 October 2008 – ERCP

2008-10-22T14:26:00.001+01:00

The ERCP, an Endoscopic procedure, enabled the hospital to insert a stent between my pancreas and liver. This was carried out under Xray conditions and the purpose was to open up the tube currently being squashed by the ‘growth’ and allow my body to function properly again and rid me of the jaundice.
The constant itching due to the jaundice has driven me mad of late; as soon as that begins to dissipate I will be so much more relieved.

The walk from the Hospital car part to the hospital entrance was so painful and harrowing that I could not have given my name to anyone had I been asked. I was so grateful that my partner found a wheel chair for me to use that stayed with me for the rest of the morning. The NHS staff were again brilliant in their professionalism and compassion.

We are now waiting for an appointment with a view to being told what the next procedure will be and whether or not I have Cancer once again.

Political soundness of mind

2008-10-15T15:20:00.000+01:00

I could not let it wait too long before thanking Gordon Brown for renewing my faith in good old fashioned Socialist values and the role he has played in leading not on the UK but also Europe and the US on a trip to recovery. The recession still has a way to travel but at least the melt down has been arrested a little.
I always believed many years ago that G. Brown would come out of the shadows of the former Labour Party Leader John Smith [1938-1994] having spent many years learning from the great man, whose life was unfortunately cut short.
Now that he has stepped out of the darker recesses of the shadows left by Blair G. Brown has been able to show the depth of his political prowess without breaking into a sweat or, as Blair would’ve done, a song and dance about it.
It is now time to put an end to the Greedy and self motivated rule of law in both Governments and Banking systems alike and a final nail or knife in the back to the legacy left by Thatcherism, New Labour [Blair] and the Zionist that is GW Bush.

2008-10-14T09:34:00.001+01:00

Sorry but I will not be on here for a little while and when I am I will be fighting with my other Blog for for the time being .... speak soon.

Double, double, toil and trouble

2008-10-08T17:29:00.002+01:00

The current financial crisis continues to dominate the news with the top four stories on the internet news site I regularly read predicting the recession will last more than a year. As we are just beginning to feel the effects of the crisis ourselves the dreaded Christmas word rears its head as the shops begin to fill with Christmas wares. We are of a mind to get back to basics when it comes to the festive season and cut right back on presents and make more of the occasion through food with friends and family.
My mother always ensures we have meat on the table at Christmas as she pays weekly into an account with the local butcher for her four children so they have more than enough to eat over and beyond the festive season.
We noticed today whilst out perusing a local butchers that along side the best cuts of meat were also some more of the old traditional off-cuts that have not been in favour for a number of years. The thought of making my own Ox tail soup is mouth watering! Any recipes?

Rock Chick

2008-10-02T15:00:00.002+01:00

I just have to share this article on Palin with the who ever reads my post, especially Democratic friends from over the pond.

The right money wronged.

2008-10-02T13:39:00.000+01:00

Having watched Gordon Brown deliver his Party conference speech I thought it only right and proper that I should listen live to that given by David Cameron at his Party’s conference in Birmingham.
I found it so dull and uninspiring that I cannot bring myself to place a link to it here and, if I am honest, it is not worth seeking out on the net anywhere else either.
Our politics and politicians are dull and dire at the best of times but given the economic climate at the moment you would expect them to take advantage of the situation and gee everyone else up especially those in the electorate that are suffering most.
As in the US most common folk, I include myself in that, believe most of the blame lay not only at the politician’s doorstep but also of those who work in the finance industry who have taken much out of the system in the way of profits both for themselves and the share holders.
And which side of the fence do they sit, ayes to the right.

Back' in Labour

2008-09-24T09:56:00.002+01:00

I watched Gordon Brown deliver his speech at the Party conference yesterday afternoon and I was so impressed I immediately stopped what I was doing to listen. It was so refreshing to hear someone who once again sounded like a true Labourite instead of New Labour. To be honest the tag of New is now well and truly laboured. I only hope that those who wish to challenge his leadership for their own gain will now shut up and work with the rest of the Party to ensure we come out of this recession with some good standing.

I for one will not be sad on hearing this mornings badly timed news that Front Bench lady Ruth Kelly, claiming to want to spend more time with her children, has decided it is time to step down. I despise people who put themselves and their religious beliefs to the detriment of everything and everyone else and therefore I do not think she will be a loss to the Labour front benches.
The best move for this transport secretary is to put the throttle to the floor and disappear into the horizon quickly.

On, off or over?

2008-09-22T14:03:00.001+01:00

My partner has promised me two things before I am 50 next year, one is to marry me and the other is to finish the jumper she started knitting for me over 18 months ago. She has recently picked the knitting up again so perhaps she intends arranging the wedding for next year after all?

We had begun to put Christmas off for this year, or at least warn of less presents this yuletide, and just concentrate on the festivities and general feelings of wellbeing over the holidays but my mother now assures me the credit crunch is over. Should she tell Gordon Brown?

I am sure all mortgage holders both sides of the Atlantic would prefer my mother’s predictions, however she has not always had a very good track record. Today she said it would be lovely and sunny, it is raining.

No longer green, just yellow

2008-09-19T10:43:00.001+01:00

I have to scold myself for not posting to the blog for over eight days!
We have had three birthdays on the trot over the last eight days, accumulating with my 49th Birthday today [just one more until the big 50].
I have just been diagnosed, on top of everything else, as having Obstructive Jaundice and have spent the best part of the last five days itching and scratching from head to foot.
I suppose I have quite a bit to moan about so will be getting on here again in a while, I am off to enjoy some of my birthday presents, especially the special liquorice toffee from my daughter.

Striking a balance

2008-09-11T09:47:00.004+01:00

I can now confirm that the CERN project has had an immediate and profound affect on the equilibrium of the Universe as we know it – England beat Croatia 4-1 in the World Cup qualifiers.

If sometime over the next few weeks, as testing intensifies, perhaps it could see its way clear to tipping the scales of fortune in my direction by ensuring my six numbers are drawn from this weeks Lotto.

_____________________________________________________

Why, as a nation, are we over sensitive when it comes to poking fun at Religious and Terrorist figures that centre on the Muslim faith? A police officer is to be hauled over the coals for dressing up as Bin Laden at his local Carnival, and for this he has been referred to the Independent Police Complaints Commission [IPCC].

A friend of mine dressed up as the Pope for a fancy dress party the other week and another dressed as a stocking wearing Nun and no one complained.

We also get uptight about people dressing as Nazi’s or the evil Fuhrër himself, yet comedians in this country have built careers doing just that.

I do not see it as a problem if someone dresses as Bin Laden, the Pope, Adolf or Christ, it is these very subjects that frighten and amuse us and poking fun at them is not necessarily disrespectful.

What is disrespectful is telling others that they are being Racist in doing so or not allowing others to express views on Terrorists or Faiths.

We are repeatedly told that Muslim does not equal terrorist, which I truly believe, however if that is the case then Bin Laden equals terrorist not Muslim and is fair game.

Be afraid!

2008-09-10T12:38:00.001+01:00

The CERN giant particle collider project has been switched on and has begun it set-up runs to determine many unanswered questions about our universe.

Am I scared? NO

The UK, like many other European countries, are set to enter a period of recession and my sick pay is about to sop.

Am I scared? NO

In the US an action figure portraying the Republican vice-presidential candidate as an executive, a superhero and a schoolgirl goes on sale [view video]. A school girl?

Am I scared? You bet your bottom dollar I am!

Big Bang, Winds of Change, or Damp Squid?

2008-09-07T15:51:00.003+01:00

On Wednesday of this week a machine will be switched on, which if it works, will answer many scientific questions about the universe and how it was created. If it does not work not only will it have been a complete waste of money as well as human intellectual resource but is may also, according to the more pessimistic of us, be the end of the universe as we know it.

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC), a particle collider built in Geneva, is a fascinating project even for the most unknowledgeable of persons such as me. I read an article about the experiment in the week and watched on TV last night a program all about the LHC [The project is 20 years in the making and I hear about it two days ago!]and eagerly wait with interest to see if:
1. I am still here after the switch on.
And,
2. If it will answer the age old question of where the other sock disappears too when it comes out of the dryer?

More info on the LHC: Guardian

Sport Aid

2008-09-07T12:18:00.001+01:00

Call me a meanie, call me disability-phob, but can some one please tell me what the Paralympics are all about?

Personally I am not opposed to people with disabilities competing against one another, but on such a scale as the Paralympics for me does not justify the financial cost when money could be spent improving the lives of disabled persons in other Countries where they have fewer opportunities and less facilities or acceptance.

I am one step away from being registered disabled myself [and will probably be a step closer should any one in a wheel chair ever come across me] but I really do not understand why we have an Olympics for the disabled when what we should be doing is encouraging those who can to compete against able bodied folk; after all, isn’t that what we encourage in everyday life, give or take one or two understandable alterations such as adapted toilets and access etc.

I cannot bring myself to watch the spectacle in the way that I did the Olympic Games that preceded them.
I see nothing wrong with someone shooting a gun or even an arrow from a bow whilst seated in a wheel chair if they were to compete in the modern Olympics, which are supposed to portray all that is good about the human race.

To hold these games up as an example of what can be achieved by someone with a disability is not a good way to portray how we should treat someone with a disability, they are not separate, special or different to any of us as we too could find ourselves in their position one day, but to place them in an arena that does more to highlight the fact that some one has lost an arm or a leg rather then what they can achieve does nothing for me as a spectator or to further the cause of accepting disability into society.

Sure, for health and safety reasons start the wheelchair racers off on a separate start line in the Marathon as they do in London, but to single out disability as reason enough to warrant a separate race is surely racism of some form or another. Why not have a separate starting line for Men and Women? Oh, they do? Is that not sexism?

Political change

2008-09-05T10:39:00.002+01:00

I have seen two sound bites of John McCain on two separate occasions and on both he used and put great emphasis on the word ‘change’. Is he trying to steal Obama’s thunder in more ways than one?
I think the endorsement and choice of a female running mate has been necessary in order to pick up on a trick that the Democrats missed, had they gone for a lady VP then the race would all but be over.

Whilst the American’s look forward to a legitimate political campaign we in the UK are once again experiencing a behind the scenes hate campaign by lesser political figures, or men who have had their day such as Charles Clark, trying to undermine the slender political advantage the Labour party have and use the current national and international credit crisis to destabilise government.

The US has a real chance of change especially on the International stage. We in the UK are not ready for a change of its own just yet as there is no political body in the UK with an alternative agenda that would bring us sort of change that will make our streets, possessions and families safe from all the other ills in our country affected by ‘youth crime’ guns and knifes.

Don't shoot the kids!

2008-09-02T09:48:00.000+01:00

Sarah Palin, the running mate to the Republican US candidate John McCain, has a seventeen year old daughter who is pregnant! So what, who cares?
More worrying are her Christian values, her gun totting ways, [grizzly bears allegedly], her anti-abortion point of view and her support for teaching creationism alongside evolution in science classes at state schools.
As Obama says, ‘kids should be out-of-bounds’ when it comes to political posturing, and with all the ammunition he has to throw at Palin he will never need give the kids [all of them] a second glance.

Obama speech

2008-08-29T10:29:00.000+01:00

I was unable to sleep last night and came down stairs for a cup of tea and ended up watching the US Democrat Convention in Denver. You folks sure as hell know how to do politics when it comes to a rally. The speech by Obama must have delivered more than even his harshest critic could have hoped for. Along side the speech by Al Gore I have no doubt the people of America will have no option other than to vote for change, and lets face it if ever it was needed it is now.

My only concern is that some of this rhetoric and enthusiasm was shown as Tony Blair began his campaign to become PM in the UK many years ago now. Had I know he was to turn into a Conservative along the way I would never have voted for him.

I only hope the clothes Obama wears do not also turn into that of a Wolf.

Cowards

2008-08-25T23:22:00.000+01:00

The son of a friend of ours was last night set upon by a gang of lads whilst walking home from a night out with his friends. He serves in the British Armed Forces and has had a tour of duty in Iraq. He left a night club early after celebrating a mate’s twenty-first birthday to be with his expectant wife and son. He was attacked whilst walking to a taxi rank for a ride home. I can only hope that the cowards that did this are one day unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

It must be bad enough not knowing who the enemy are whilst in places like Iraq but to have similar in your own country is just disgraceful.

Game over

2008-08-24T13:55:00.001+01:00

What am I to do now that the Beijing Olympics are coming to an end? When I get up in the early hours of the morning I will have nothing to watch on TV and now hoping for another Gold medal for Team GB.
We have just had our most successful games ever and in four years time we will be hoping for a similar, if not better, result then. I am still annoyed that the UK still felt the need to bid for and hold the Games in the London when money, time and effort should have been put into a second attempt by the City of Manchester, if not then perhaps a more central City such as Birmingham. Although I appreciate the ‘feel good’ factor the Games can bring I am not so sure that having most of the facilities in London will benefit the Country as a whole when most UK citizens rarely, if ever, visit the Capital city.
The Midlands already lost out to the building of the National football stadium at Wembley and if it had been situated centrally in the Country we may not have had the delay and overspend before the stadium was eventually opened and let’s hope that the same mistakes are not made with the Olympic building programmes.

I guess I will have to get back to taking notice of the more important things on the World stage that affect mankind in a less than favourable manner than the success of the Games.

I've got the Olympics covered

2008-08-21T11:57:00.001+01:00

As our Team GB sportsmen and women continue to do well in Beijing, on course for an unprecedented medal haul, I was able to put my own pains to one side and play a game of crown green bowls, which I won 21-16 [revenge on the opponent who beat me by two shots on his home green earlier in the season].

I paid a visit to a Charity shop whilst in the town yesterday and bought four reading books for my partner and I as we seem to be getting through quite a bit of reading material of late.

In what looks like being the wettest August in the UK for almost 100 years it does not look as though I will be digging on the allotment any time soon, although we are still living quite happily off the produce it has produced.

There are far too many interesting article in the online newspaper I regularly read and I must take some time out from the Olympic TV coverage to find out what else is happening in the wider world, baring the tragic plane crash is Spain yesterday I am a bit out short on World events right now.

Almost forgot to mention, we are beating the Aussies in the Olympic medals table, which is not going down too well down under [do they forget without us they wouldn’t have a country or the sports they choice to play?] They moan even more than I do.

So much that is good and then some...

2008-08-18T23:47:00.001+01:00

Another good day at the Olympics for Team GB, we dominated the rowing events and are doing even better in the cycling races.

I read an interesting article on the Olympic village and would’ve been a place I could’ve slotted into in my youth had I the will power that some of these athletes possess in order to reach their goals. Those that have not cheated to get there, and there seems to be less coverage or outage of drug cheats than at any other time, are all winners in my mind.

Whilst we are watching the best in the World compete at the Olympics the worst are still playing their own silly games with the lives of others.

I refer to an instance locally, and too close for comfort, when a man was murdered last Saturday night in the road opposite where we live not more than 200 yards away. It comes to something when the flashing lights of the emergency services do not drag me to the window [I really am a nosey parker, lol]. It has become so common place for incidents to happen that the blue flashing lights no longer grab ones attention.

The Olympics have the ability to take us away from the seedier side of human life and rejoice in the Athletic best of human endeavours. If only we could apply such dedication to improving the World as a whole. No commercial value in that I guess.

How to beat the rest

2008-08-17T11:42:00.001+01:00

I was writing this in reply to a posting on another blog in the US [yellowdoggrannie; which is one I visit regularly and it is hard to believe that some people in the US are just like those in the movies. I wonder if they see us in the UK in the same way we are portrayed on the Big screen?] when I suddenly realised what is missing in order to combat drunken youths on our streets. Official bodies with big sticks!

The parents of the delinquents on our streets in the UK are to blame for most of the ills of their kids, they either don’t care or do no have the wherewithal to administer suitable punishment for their earlier misdemeanours, which means they turn even nastier as they get older and, in most cases, end up drunk on our streets most weekends. We should introduce ‘stick’ police on our streets who would smack drunken kids up the arse and wrap the fingers of those who buy alcohol for minors.

If I can see several youths walking away from the local shops with cans of cheap booze then surely a ‘beat’ bobby [as in walking the beat and not beating the crap out of] would be able to see them also and, unlike myself, be able to confiscated said alcohol and wrap knuckles accordingly.

Their parents are either too drunk to care themselves or must be so thick that they cannot smell alcohol on their breath or see that their children are intoxicated.

On a prouder note for my fellow country men and women we have another four Gold medals so far today at the Beijing Olympics.

[If there were medals for inconsiderate kids and parents we would top the league table]

Green with envy

2008-08-16T17:30:00.001+01:00

Four Gold medals and a total of nine medals for Team GB was the most successful day so far for GB. A brilliant 100m final race, won convincingly by Jamaica’s Usain Bolt in a World record time of 9.69sec, and the seventh Gold for Michael Phelps made the days viewing all the more satisfying to watch. Now that Phelps has his seventh I sincerely hope he goes on the take his eighth and set a new record breaking best.

My own sporting prowess on the Bowling Green was curtailed even before it began today due to stomach and back pains as I was unable to enter our own local competition on my home green.

Armchair athlete

2008-08-15T20:39:00.001+01:00

It has not been a very good week health or weather wise from where I am sitting this week. Unfortunately the allotment has not had much attention; thankfully it is well watered if not weeded. Fortunately the Olympics coverage has made up for the time I have spent in bed or on the settee not being or feeling well.

I am almost wishing [but not wanting] Michael Phelps will fail in at least one of his Olympic challenges for no other reason than the feeling that it would give the winner of such an event; imagine beating someone who appears almost invincible? He is already the most successful Olympian ever, what more could he want? [Does he ever smile?] Have you seen how much this bloke eats? No wonder there is a world wide food shortage.

For different reasons, who ever started it, I was also hoping that Georgia would come out on top of the Russians in the recent round of East European madness. I am so glad that some of the Georgian athletes were able to beat their Russian opponents in both beach volleyball and one of the combat sports. [Who ever thought of introducing beach volley ball as an Olympic event? Put some clothes on for heavens sake!]

Now that the track and field events have started we can expect to see the US overtake China in the medal table surely? But before all of that Team GB have a great chance of increasing our tally in the boat races tomorrow and on two wheels in the Velodrome.

Having a smashing time of it...

2008-08-11T23:44:00.000+01:00

I have been missing for a day or two, OK a week, due to several factors. My partner, her mother and our three year old daughter were in road crash in Wales on the Monday as I discovered just after making my last post on this Blog spot.
I had to go and pick them up from the hospital some 100 miles away and bring them back home.
Apart from bruising and the mother-in-laws cracked sternum, they are all well, alas the car is not.
Our three yr old suffered no effects at all apart from being able to introduce a crash scenario into her play with her toys cars, bless.

With my health not being too good of late we have had to rely on others to lend a hand, it is a good job we have three healthy and lovely teenage daughters between us.
So, this is a thank you to them.
And yes, we will treat them once we are all on the mend again.

Thank God for Liberals

2008-08-04T11:09:00.001+01:00

Religion was most probably conceived to prevent mankind from falling out with one another and to live, wherever possible, to live in peace and harmony.

So how can religious leaders claim to represent a God that excludes from its door men and women whom love someone of the same sex?

The outfits, or uniforms, of these self righteous bigots, like their values, are relics of the dark to middle to ages and in order to bring themselves up to date they need to look within themselves before judging others so quickly.

The Anglican Church still faces the possibility of a split over the issue of same sex marriages and the consecration of gay clergy. What is it scared of really? Losing the money and strength it can muster from staying together or the wrath of God?

Oh, let’s just phone the big man up and ask him shall we. But if he is not answering his phone why not blame the Liberals?

Who's bag?

2008-08-03T19:10:00.000+01:00

With my partner and youngest daughter away camping for the weekend I was rather pleased to have spent a good two hours on the allotment weeding between the rows of produce as well as picking those that were ready for harvest, such as potatoes, runner-beans and broad beans.

After making dinner for myself and my step-daughter I sat down to catch-up with internet and email reading when I came across this interesting article on 31 days without plastic. ‘Not My Bag’.

I was intrigued to read about this one woman mission because part of my chores for the day involved putting out the items of plastic we have for recycling and although we rarely use supermarket carrier bags anymore I was astonished to realise just how much plastic we do use.

We are such a wasteful nation and I think it about time Government and Companies did more to reduce our dependency upon plastics. I will be following the plastic free quest with interest over the next month.

Not lazy, just lazing

2008-07-30T23:42:00.002+01:00

Why is it that I do not seem to have much to say of late? I cannot remember the last time I had a good old rant about the Labour Party in the UK or Gormless Bush in the States, [thankfully his time is coming to an end and the people of the US have an apparent human to vote for].

I guess when you have something playing on your mind you tend to glance over issues such as those occurring in Turkey and its attempts to produce an Islamic State, or the Civil rights issues still being blatantly flouted by those governing China, or even the hike in fuel and gas prices currently being poured onto the British Consumer.

However, none of these things have gone away and some of them probably never will, not in my life time, but that does not mean I am going to ignore them, it’s just that I am on a break, as Ross Geller once said about himself and Rachel.

I am taking time out to enjoy the last vestiges of the GB summer, [whilst anxiously hoping for a late ‘Indian Summer’ to arrive in September], and have spent time relaxing in the garden and enjoying a few wins on the bowling green, [Back Pains permitting].

The Great British Summer

2008-07-28T11:06:00.000+01:00

I have been missing from the blog scene for a day or two once again; my excuse this time is a genuine one – The Great British Summer has arrived, at last!
We have had several glorious days of hot, sticky summer sunshine

We have spent time at the allotment watching the produce growing, we have once again picked amble supplies to see us through the week. We have had the cycles, pushbikes, out again, this time visiting a local Water and Leisure Park, which was brilliant.

Pleasant evenings playing bowls and having a pint of beer afterwards with friends has been so much the better for the lovely weather.

We even had barbeque in the garden yesterday evening.

My back pains have withstood most of the minor physical activities they have had to endure over the last day or two, so life has been good.

The current sunny spell is due to break-up again tomorrow according to the analysts, oh well, it was good whilst it lasted.