Blood Transfusion 16 January 2009

Yesterday’s transfusion was not without its problems, namely the needle not going in once again. We had a nurse who was working overtime in the Ward to gain a little extra cash and she had come down from the Pathology lab so if anyone should find a vein it is she. Eventually we did, only this time we used the right arm instead of the left. Other medical professionals are usually reluctant to use the right arm because of the extensive surgery that was carried out on it many years ago [right distal ulna partially removed].
Added to the problem with the needle was the malfunction of part of the blood bag that meant a second nurse and the floor both got covered in blood.
Once it was in and settled I gave way to thoughts of the blood belonging to my 18 year old daughter [It made me feel more comfortable believing it had come from someone so close who is as fit as a fiddle] since she has recently began to donate; we are both part of a rare blood group.
I had two units [two bags, no idea how much was in each] spread over four hours, two hours per bag.

It was a good job I took a film in to watch on my portable DVD player; ‘Adaptation’ starring Nicolas Cage and Meryl Streep. – a definite 9 out 10 from me for this one. I loved ‘Being John Malkovich’ so I guess it is only natural to love this too.

But I digress; this is not film review site...

So, the blood test was supposed to be an instant tonic and give the boost I required to at least feel near to ‘normal’ again. When we got home, around late afternoon time, I fell asleep on the settee and was not woken-up until it was time for me to go to bed, where I slept extremely well until this morning and then, after breakfast, I fell asleep on the settee. I cannot believe for one minute that the blood yesterday was that belonging to my daughter and I would even question it being human at all! More likely to be that of a Sloth or a tortoise.

Chemotherapy #3 [3/7]

Definitely the worse one yet!

My veins appear to close down the minute Chemotherapy is administered and no longer wish to play ball. It took at least six, if not seven, long and painful attempts to get a needle in and then once there for it to function properly.

My Haemoglobin is on the low side and as a result so am I, both emotionally and physically.
For no apparent reason I could cry my eyes out and there is no way I can prevent it from occurring; this is embarrassing for a grown man! It first happened this morning when I stepped on the weighing scales and discovered that with yet more weight loss I am now only 10 st 1 ½ lbs. [141.5 lbs]. I nearly filled the bath I was running with tears instead of the hot water from the central heating system.
All I could think of was the poor people who were sent to concentration camps during WWII and how they must have felt about themselves. I cannot even begin to imagine how low their self esteem must have been with how emaciated they were.

During many attempts to have the needle inserted both my partner and I broke out into tears as I thought of the girl who had cancer at the same time I did in 1992 and all the sad memories of that time came rushing back. It is not how I usually remember her as I am still in contact with her family, despite the fact that she never made it through in ’93, and her lovely sister is so effervescent. [She is also rather round in the belly department as her first born is reluctant to make an appearance].

I am booked in for a blood transfusion on Friday to help me get back on my feet, provided they can get a needle in that is!