11 June 2009 – Oncology appointment

We met with the Oncology Doctor today and it is more of the same for a while, three more chemotherapy sessions over the next three weeks following by a short break, two weeks this time.

We requested a two week break if possible in order to get away for another holiday, this time doing Bed and Breakfasts from home to Scotland and back. We are keeping fingers crossed that I once again improve on chemotherapy and have no set-backs.span>

10 June 2009 – Not feeling too grand

I feel as if I am being made to suffer today as suffer I have indeed. Upon waking this morning, having slept throughout the night for the first time in so long I cannot recall how long since the last full nights rest, I realised I had not taken last night’s tablets. Add to the lack of medication the fact that I have been overdoing it and the combination leaves me extremely tired and weak, so much so that I was in tears first thing through pain, mental anguish and general lethargy.

I have since come around a little today and thankfully we managed to put off phoning the hospital through general concern.

Although I have a day off chemotherapy this week I am not feeling any of the benefits as I am unable to leave the settee really being too weak to walk far without pain or being short of breath.

Chemotherapy #2 of 3

I can honestly say that it is getting easier to have chemotherapy now that I am feeling better again. I am able to relax more and as a result I believe those around me, including the nurses, also find it easier to administer the medication.
One nurse [Lorraine – she has now drawn the ‘short straw’ four times out of five] and one needle results in one successful trip to the Oncology outpatients.

We can now begin to look forward even more to our plans to holiday between chemo sessions.

Naturally I shall begin to feel tired later and maybe a little sick but in the scheme of things that is no great hardship.

Chemotherapy session #3

It has been a much better chemotherapy session today with just two attempts with the needle by the one nurse, the poor girl who has had to deal with me for the previous two weeks has had to attend me again today.
Although I am quite adamant that the needle will not go in either the back of my hand or arm they will insist on trying, but now she says she will listen to me in future as the first attempt in the back of the arm failed.

I am now hoping that the chemo will begin to do its magic as I have a week’s break between now and the next one in which time I can expect and appointment to see the Oncologist.

I have also been prescribed eye drops for an infection I picked up earlier in the week in both eyes and I expect them to be less sticky first thing in the morning.

I should have a wheelchair delivered tomorrow all being well but I would have to be ‘assessed’ on health and safety grounds to have a bath seat supplied because water is involved. I have instructed them to cancel the bath seat as I am not going to subject myself to being poked and prodded unnecessarily to satisfy some jobs-worth, red tape or H&S directive when I have been party to more than my fair share of examinations already.
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The laptop is still poorly and I am expecting an engineer to arrive tomorrow with a new hard drive or motherboard under his arm.

Laptop ill too.

Just to let folks know that my laptop is knackered again and I have an engineer coming out on Thursday to fix it. I will try to get on when I can with updates.

This week is blood on Tuesday and Chemotherapy on Wednesday.

Speak soon

Appointment with Oncology Doctor – good news/bad news

We had no idea what to expect from today’s appointment and came away with both bad and good news.

The bad news is that chemotherapy will be reintroduced sometime around Easter as I need to ‘stabilize’ my condition and have my stomach investigated for causes of the bouts of sickness I have experienced of late.

The good news is that if I can stabilize myself and have any ‘blockage’ or restriction in my stomach relieved then they will consider sending a request to London for possible Cyberknife treatment.

It would appear that the sickness may be due to pressure on the stomach, could be from the tumour, or that there is now a problem within the stomach that needs further investigation. For this the doctor has suggested an x-ray with a tracer dye to highlight any possible causes.

I now await an appointment date for chemotherapy and the x-ray.

A welcome break from treatment

I feel so much better for not having gone for Chemo yesterday, I am still tired and run out of breath easily, as shown this morning whilst helping Zoe put down a base for our new greenhouse, but I can cope with that for now.
I am relatively pain free compared to how I was a while ago so from that point of view chemo treatment has been quite successful. I hope this coming Friday, when I meet the Oncology doctor that she also confirms the effectiveness of the treatment and that it is indeed working.
I guess it also helps psychologically knowing that I do not have to fight with the needles and veins and the nausea that follows.

Chemotherapy #6 [6/7] – Another good one for me, but not for some

Once again I had Nurse Donna attend to my chemotherapy session and it went off without a hitch, well apart from them not allowing my youngest daughter in the chemo suite. We had to drag my eldest daughter kicking and screaming out of work to come and pick her up from us. [OK, she relished the chance to get out of work an hour early and then be treated to a MacDonald’s meal; I have a penchant for them after Chemo and picked one up for everyone].

Another poor lady patient was not having it so easy and was where I was at a week or so ago when it mattered not what was said to her she was going to break out into tears, she was at the end of her tether and it was difficult to watch. I also know that nothing I or anyone else said to her would not make one iota of difference. I just wish she was as fortunate as me in having someone like my wife around. It makes so much difference and I know without her I would find it so much harder than it already is.

Chemotherapy #5 [5/7] – What a difference

I felt so much more relaxed going into hospital today as I have been feeling better than I had in months. I was less tired and relatively pain free and quite a number of the nurses commented on how well I was looking.
What was even better was the treatment itself which went without a hitch and the nurse, Donna, was almost as pleased and relieved as I was that it did. I left hospital with a spring in my step.
I am now hoping that with a reduced dosage, as recommended by the Doctor on Friday, will not bring on too much nausea or drowsiness.
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This Country is hopeless when it comes to dealing with an overnight downfall of snow. Thousands of schools have been closed today as the town bore witness to gangs of kids hanging around the shopping centre with nothing else to do. I remember as a lad walking to school in a foot or more of snow with no question of the school closing. Whatever happened to that fighting spirit we were so renowned for around the World?]

Mid chemo review – Friday 30 January 2009

We went to the hospital for a mid chemo review not knowing what to expect from the consultant so we were somewhat relieved when she told us the tumour was reacting well to the chemo. She was concerned about the side effects of the treatment that were making me so tired and has as a result decided to reduce chemo dosage for the next session.

The plan of action now is to finish the seven chemo sessions if possible and then to continue with treatment on a three weekly basis with one week off in between.

I had the best night’s sleep in ages on Friday.

Chemotherapy #4 [4/7] – Better luck this time around

Well, my blood counts were fine but there is a problem with my liver that I may find out more about this Friday as I have an appointment with the specialist arranged for then. It is classed as a chemotherapy review and I am hoping this is just routine practice and not because of any other underlying problems. This time around the chemotherapy and needle insertion was for me relatively easy, even easier than for the lady in the next bay to me who also struggles with her veins. We were in a side room away from the other patients, and I am left thinking was this coincidence or was it for a reason? It may have been for our own comfort and to make it less traumatic that we were segregated.

Today I am struggling with extreme pains in my stomach, let’s hope the hot water bottle that is sat on my lap does the trick and helps to alleviate the pain.

Blood test – pre chemo

I cannot begin to tell you how relieved I was not to have to wait in the queue with everyone else to have my blood taken today. I was informed last week that as a chemotherapy patient I did not have to take a ticket and wait. I put it to the test in a full waiting room as I just stood waiting for an available pathology nurse. The looks I got when I went straight in were to die for! [Excuse the pun].
The staff are so sympathetic towards me when they go to take blood, my arms are as thin as they possibly could be and are full of holes and marks left by the plasters that have covered them [they are a pig to wash off].

I have been feeling pretty low all weekend despite the transfusion on Friday and I am not expecting my blood counts and levels to be that good for tomorrow.

I also took the opportunity of returning the TENS machine to the hospital that I was so kindly given on loan when I required it for the pains in my back. I signed myself off from the Pain Clinic now that I am being tended to by the Cancer ward at the University City hospital.

Chemotherapy #3 [3/7]

Definitely the worse one yet!

My veins appear to close down the minute Chemotherapy is administered and no longer wish to play ball. It took at least six, if not seven, long and painful attempts to get a needle in and then once there for it to function properly.

My Haemoglobin is on the low side and as a result so am I, both emotionally and physically.
For no apparent reason I could cry my eyes out and there is no way I can prevent it from occurring; this is embarrassing for a grown man! It first happened this morning when I stepped on the weighing scales and discovered that with yet more weight loss I am now only 10 st 1 ½ lbs. [141.5 lbs]. I nearly filled the bath I was running with tears instead of the hot water from the central heating system.
All I could think of was the poor people who were sent to concentration camps during WWII and how they must have felt about themselves. I cannot even begin to imagine how low their self esteem must have been with how emaciated they were.

During many attempts to have the needle inserted both my partner and I broke out into tears as I thought of the girl who had cancer at the same time I did in 1992 and all the sad memories of that time came rushing back. It is not how I usually remember her as I am still in contact with her family, despite the fact that she never made it through in ’93, and her lovely sister is so effervescent. [She is also rather round in the belly department as her first born is reluctant to make an appearance].

I am booked in for a blood transfusion on Friday to help me get back on my feet, provided they can get a needle in that is!

Chemotherapy #2 [2/7]

The whole procedure is so much easier when the needle goes in first time, albeit a little painful as the nurse, Sam, was not as skilful as Rose from last week in inserting the needle for the cannula.
The session went that quickly that I was only able to watch one program from the first series of ‘The Likely Lads’. I have felt a little nauseous since yesterday but I will not know the full extent of side effects until later in the week, I will endeavour to keep you posted.

Saturday 03 January 2009, four days after Chemo #1

For anyone else going through the same as me, or similar, take heart the Chemotherapy, that nearly killed me sixteen years ago, is this time doing me some good, in-as-much that it has taken some of the pains away. I have yet to be sick, it is still early days, although I am even more tired than I have been of late, if that is at all possible!I am not dreading the thought of having more treatment on Tuesday as I thought I would be because to be free of the pains, despite the generally feeling of being unwell, is wonderful.

Chemotherapy #1 [1/7]

Chemo #1 did not pass without its problems, namely the Cannula [the needle and vent flow they put in the back of the hand] and the vein on the back of my hand not acting as they should. Firstly the vein would not play ball and did not wish to show its ugly head, despite being plunged and soaked in hot water before hand, then as I hit it a few times with my other hand it soon jumped to the foreground. Thus the needle in the cannula had a target to hit, but once in it also did not go to plan

Having gone through all the routine and necessary paperwork with Nurse Rachel I was ‘flushed’ through the arm with a saline solution before the Chemo was due to be connected. Whilst I was being flushed I was informed of what to expect with regards to the possible side effects of the therapy, should I be so unlucky as to get them.
The needle in the cannula began to hurt the moment the Chemo was introduced into the system and into my arm. After several attempts it was decided to re-cannulate further up the arm, this time with much more success using Sister Rose’s lucky tourniquet.

Although the injection of the treatment lasted approximately ½ hour we were there for at least two hours, most of the time being taken up with the cannula problems and the filling and cross checking of paperwork.

Naturally having gone through this process many years ago, and having suffered quite badly at the hands of Chemotherapy, I was quite uptight and apprehensive throughout the whole process.

I am now at home and I wait for the side effects to take effect, because let’s face it, given my luck, it is bound to happen.

I have very little hair to lose so that does not worry me, unfortunately I have little to lose from my stomach since I am not eating as well as I might so I am hoping that the anti-sickness tablets supplied do their work.

Subsequent chemo sessions are booked for every Tuesday over the next seven weeks should I be fortunate enough for them to work and have no adverse side effects.